By Jenny Peterson
Today, we’re going to tackle something that affects so many of us: overthinking. If you’ve ever found yourself caught in a never-ending loop of thoughts, playing out scenarios, reliving embarrassing moments, or simply being unable to turn off your brain before bed—then this post is for you. We’re going to unpack why we overthink, what its roots are, how it contributes to chronic health issues and how we can break free from it.
WHAT IS OVERTHINKING?
Overthinking — a word many of us can instantly relate to. It’s that endless loop in your mind that keeps replaying scenarios, re-analyzing conversations, and second-guessing every little detail. It tricks us into thinking we’re being productive when, in reality, we’re just stuck.
Have you ever had a brilliant idea, only to talk yourself out of it because you over-thought it to death? You convinced yourself it wouldn’t work, or that people would judge you, so you never took action. That’s overthinking in a nutshell—it stops you from moving forward and limits your potential.
It’s not problem-solving, it’s problem-prolonging. You may feel like you’re trying to protect yourself from making mistakes or facing uncertainty, but what overthinking really does is keep you in a place of fear, anxiety, and indecision.
I’m sure you’ve been there. But, how do you know for sure if you’re an overthinker?
Here are seven signs:
You have trouble sleeping because your brain starts replaying everything that happened during the day.
You struggle to make decisions and constantly second-guess the ones you’ve already made.
You relive embarrassing moments, obsessing over conversations or experiences long after they’re over.
You often ask, "What if?" or "Why me?" questions.
Your mind is so busy that it’s hard to concentrate.
You try to read between the lines of everything people say or you constantly need reassurance. Like asking, "Are you mad at me?" or "Did I annoy you?"
You feel paralyzed by thoughts, unable to move forward.
If you find yourself nodding along to any of these, chances are, you’ve fallen into the overthinking trap.
So, what exactly is overthinking? It’s that endless loop in your mind that keeps you stuck. What might take someone else five seconds to decide, takes you five days. You look at it from every angle, overanalyzing and overcomplicating, convincing yourself you’re being productive when in reality, you’re just spinning your wheels.
But here’s the key takeaway: overthinking is a subconscious pattern. Like many of the mental habits we struggle with, it often stems from our childhood experiences. Overthinking is not a form of problem-solving. Problem-solving is action-based and focuses on what you can control, while overthinking is rooted in fear, anxiety, and the need to control the uncontrollable.
At its core, overthinking is a defense mechanism, a subconscious habit designed to keep you safe from uncertainty. But here’s the problem—rather than protecting you, it traps you in stress and anxiety.
WHY DO WE OVERTHINK?
So, what’s the root cause of overthinking?
It started somewhere, you didn’t come out of the womb like this. Who you are today, your unconscious behaviors are all subconscious programs. You are not consciously choosing to do this.
There are only 2 reasons why you do this.
It's a learned behavior. This is the monkey see monkey do way. This is where someone that you spent your entire childhood around may have been an overthinker. You saw them overthink everything through their actions and words. Young kids are smart and they pick up on all of this. As children, we learn how to respond to the world based on the examples set by the adults in our lives. If you had a parent that had anxiety, then you have most likely been passed on this survival pattern. When it's all you have been taught to respond a certain way, and you don’t know any different, it becomes your default setting. This is why you will see family members continue to pass on behaviors without even knowing it.
Fear. There is one fear or many fears connected to this kind of response. Whether it’s fear of failure, fear of judgment, or fear of the unknown, overthinking is often tied to a deep-seated fear that we may not even be consciously aware of.
You wouldn’t be overthinking if you weren’t scared of something. This doesn’t have to be consciously either. Remember that the subconscious is running the show 90% of the time, so the fear isn’t most likely something that you are consciously aware of. The subconscious mind works 90% of the time without us even realizing it. So, overthinking is often triggered by deeply rooted fears and limiting beliefs that are stuck in our subconscious.
At its core, overthinking is a subconscious pattern—a habit formed over time, usually stemming from our childhood. Overthinking, like anxiety, is rooted in fear. It often arises as a defense mechanism, a way to avoid uncertainty. Our mind thinks that by analyzing every possible outcome, we can prevent something bad from happening. But the truth? Overthinking doesn’t prevent anything—it just creates more stress.
So, why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we overthink? It’s simple: overthinking gives us the illusion of control. We think, 'If I just think this through enough, maybe I can avoid mistakes.' But in reality, all it does is create more anxiety.
This behavior is about control—trying to control what’s coming next, even before it happens. It’s an attempt to avoid pain, rejection, and failure. But here's the irony: in our attempt to protect ourselves from the unknown, we end up creating even more suffering.
The root of overthinking lies in our subconscious mind. When you were born, you had no preconceived experiences, but as you developed, the relationships you formed, especially with your primary caregivers, began to shape your worldview. These early experiences became the foundation of your core values and belief systems.
If those experiences were negative or traumatic, they may have led to limiting beliefs—beliefs that tell you you’re not good enough, or that the world is unsafe. Over time, your mind replays and rearranges these beliefs, forming a negative internal dialogue—what we call 'self-talk.'
Overthinking becomes a pattern of reinforcing these limiting beliefs. Your subconscious mind stores all your memories, including the ones you don’t consciously recall, and these memories seep into your conscious mind, driving your thoughts and reactions. This is why you overthink—because your subconscious mind is constantly pulling from past experiences, many of which may be outdated or irrelevant to your current life.
Let me share a story to illustrate how overthinking often starts in childhood:
Imagine a young girl named Emily, around 8 years old. Emily is a bright and curious child, but she grows up in a household where her parents are perfectionists. They love her deeply, but they have high expectations, constantly encouraging her to be the best in everything she does—whether it’s her schoolwork, behavior, or sports. Whenever Emily makes a mistake, her parents gently but consistently point it out. They often say things like, “What if you had tried harder?” or “Why didn’t you think that through more carefully?”
As a result, Emily starts becoming very cautious about everything she does. She begins to worry about making mistakes, fearing that she will disappoint her parents. When she does something wrong, she replays it in her mind over and over, asking herself questions like, “What if I had done this differently?” or “Why didn’t I see that coming?”
This habit of second-guessing herself grows as she moves through school. In her teenage years, Emily becomes anxious about making decisions, even small ones like choosing what to wear or whether to attend a social event. She worries about how others will perceive her and begins to overanalyze every interaction. Did she say the wrong thing? Did she upset someone without knowing it?
By the time Emily reaches adulthood, her pattern of overthinking is well-established. She struggles with making decisions in her career, in relationships, and in everyday life. She often relives embarrassing moments, questions her worth, and hesitates to take risks for fear of failing. Over time, this overthinking becomes a defense mechanism—a way to protect herself from the perceived dangers of making mistakes or being judged. It all started from the well-meaning but perfectionist expectations placed on her as a child.
The pressure Emily felt to get everything right created a fear of failure. Her subconscious mind stored those experiences and fears, and over time, they turned into a pattern of overthinking. This story is a reminder that early life experiences shape how we think and react as adults.
Recognizing the origins of overthinking is key to breaking free from it.
Rigid, black-and-white thinking, often rooted in strong religious beliefs, can be closely tied to overthinking. When you're raised to believe that your actions must align with a specific set of rules to either honor God or secure a place in the afterlife, it creates a mindset where everything is viewed as either right or wrong. This creates fear around making mistakes or stepping into your own power, as you worry about ending up on the "wrong" side. This fear-driven, all-or-nothing thinking keeps you trapped in a cycle of overthinking, constantly trying to avoid negative outcomes.
THE HEALTH IMPACT OF OVERTHINKING
Now, let’s talk about the toll overthinking takes on your health. When you overthink, you’re essentially living in a state of anxiety. Your brain is on high alert, constantly preparing for the worst-case scenario. This puts your body in a state of fight or flight, burning up energy, and increasing stress hormones like cortisol.
Overthinking is like pouring gasoline on the fire of anxiety, stress, and depression. It puts your body in a constant state of “fight or flight,” even though there’s no immediate danger. Over time, being in this constant sympathetic state leads to burnout, mental exhaustion, and even physical health issues. Chronic overthinking has been linked to conditions like anxiety disorders, depression, insomnia and even obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). It's not surprising that most of the students we work with in MBR are overthinkers. Their brains are constantly on, never in peace which never gives the body the opportunity to feel safe enough to heal. Instead it feels like a tiger is chasing them all the time and all the body wants to do is focus on surviving.
When we feed our minds with constant worry and fear, those thoughts eventually manifest into reality. What we think, we become. And that’s why it’s so important to stop overthinking before it takes over your life.
You may also find that overthinking stifles your creativity and keeps you from taking risks. How many great ideas have you talked yourself out of before even giving them a chance? The more time you spend dwelling on what could go wrong, the less likely you are to take action.
BREAKING THE CYCLE OF OVERHINKING
So how do you break this cycle of overthinking?
It's not a one step process. There are going to be layers that you need to work on, step by step. Remember this pattern has been with you a long time. There are patterns feeding other patterns that are all tightly woven together to keep you safe. So if you try to rush this process or force it, you will only get resistance. Moving at a pace and with the right tools that create a safe space in the subconscious is key. Don’t be hard on yourself. Give yourself grace and celebrate small victories.
Remember that overthinking is unproductive, it causes you to stay stuck. So you have to take action to change it. Here are a few actionable steps to take:
Step into awareness: Notice when you are overthinking. Don’t be shameful about it. Remember it's just an old pattern. Come from a place of curiosity. Like you're a kid again being curious about learning. Notice your amazing brain and how it's only doing what it's designed to do. Rather than thinking that there is something wrong with you. Get into the habit of journaling, which will help to build your awareness muscle. Just start writing and see what comes up until you can’t write any more. You will see overthinking show up on your paper.
Reframe the Fear: Instead of thinking, What if it goes wrong? start asking, What if it goes right?
Let go of the identity of being an overthinker. You are not defined by your patterns. Remind yourself of this whenever you catch yourself spiraling into overthinking. It’s easy to say, “I’m just an overthinker, it’s who I am.” But that’s not true. Overthinking is a learned behavior—it’s not your identity. You can change it.
Build Trust in You. Overthinking is a sign that you don’t trust yourself. Start by taking small risks—acting on your gut instincts and seeing where they lead. The more you practice, the more confident you’ll become in trusting yourself.
Identify the fear patterns that are under your overthinking. Where did this start? What are you afraid of? Judgment? Failure? Rejection? What are the limited beliefs you have formed around all of these? How can you start seeing these fears in a different light?
Learn to let go of control. This is easier said than done. Your need for control is stemmed in your fears. When you address your fears and all of the patterns connected to them, letting go of control is much easier because you learn to start trusting you and your ability to handle anything that comes your way. We want to control every outcome, to know what’s going to happen next, and to avoid mistakes at all costs. But life isn’t about certainty—it’s about flow. It’s about trusting yourself and your intuition. You must step into embracing uncertainty. Life is full of unknowns, and that’s okay. In fact, it’s part of what makes life beautiful.
CONCLUSION
Overthinking may feel like a natural part of who you are, but it’s not. It’s simply a habit—a subconscious pattern that can be reprogrammed with awareness, action, and self-compassion.
As we wrap up, I want you to remember this: Overthinking is not who you are, its not your identity. It’s a habit, a pattern, a way of coping with fear and uncertainty. You have the power to change your thought patterns, to step into action, and to trust yourself and your intuition.
If this resonated with you today, take some time to reflect. Ask yourself, 'What story am I telling myself when I overthink? What am I protecting myself from? Is this story worth keeping? Our answers are within, we just need to learn how to ask the right questions.
And if you are overthinking how to address your overthinking, then I suggest you delegate this process of unwiring all of these old patterns. Leave the complex detective work of uncovering old subconscious patterns to experts like us at MBR. We specialize in breaking these patterns down and will guide you through every step needed to address and overcome your overthinking and anxiety.
You are unique, your symptoms are connected to very specific patterns within your subconscious.
Without a plan unique to you, you will continue struggling and miss out on the life you deserve to be living! To help you get started on your long-lasting healing journey, we would love to provide you with a healing plan that is unique to you. Get your custom healing plan today!
You can also download my free healing guide, “Why Can’t I Heal” where you will learn the 5 reasons that you haven't healed despite everything you've tried. These are the missing pieces to your healing and the key to resolving your symptoms for good.
Jenny Peterson is the founder and CEO of Mind Body Rewire (MBR). She teaches those that are overwhelmed with trying to heal chronic symptoms how to simplify their healing by focusing on just one place, the subconscious mind. Learn more about MBR here.
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